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  • Writer's pictureAmanda Hoock

Self-Love - A Child's Example

My sister’s youngest son, my precious nephew, is currently eight years old. Without a doubt, I believe he will experience a wonderful life. Why do I know this? From the moment he was born he has lived his way and has been absolutely unapologetic about it. If he is upset he cries, if he is happy he shows his excitement. You will know when he likes something and will know when he doesn’t. He isn’t rude, when he tells someone that he doesn’t really like a dinner they made, he is just telling them the truth. He will even tell his loving Nana that he doesn’t feel like playing a game with her, if at that moment, he would rather be doing something else. He experiences his feelings, instead of suppressing them. He expresses most or all of his true thoughts and feelings, instead of screening and concealing certain thoughts and feelings. He communicates how he really feels about people, through showing his love or on how he decides who he spends his time with. He doesn’t seem to adjust his behavior to please others. Even though he speaks his truth, you know he is not being rude or maleficent in his behavior. He wants others to know how he feels and where he stands.

At an early age our family discovered his talent for drawing. We were all excited for his creative ability and jumped on his gift by buying him art supplies for every birthday and holiday that involved gift giving. This began to overwhelm him. Instead of this talent being something that he was able to develop and enjoy on his terms, he noticed we were taking over his passion and making it ours to control. Around the age of six, he came to me crying after I purchased him even more art supplies. He told me that he didn’t want to draw anymore. What was a natural talent and passion of his, became a chore and an expectation. He didn’t want to participate in something unless it was what he wanted to do. Fortunately, as a family we backed off and in time his passion returned. He now enjoys his creative expression of drawing by developing his artistic technique, but his way and with no pressure of others’ expectations.

Recently, he spent the night at my place. During dinner, while we were engaging in a myriad of dinner topics, I asked if he loved himself. Without a pause, he answered “Yeah, I do!” as the words were being spoken a large and authentic smile emerged over his face. There is no secret that this young boy enjoys life and cares for himself deeply. When you are around him you can feel the love he has for himself and for others. He doesn’t need to be taught how to love himself, he just does.

Imagine living so authentically and loving yourself enough that you wouldn’t compromise your own feelings. An existence in which you are motivated to be yourself, rather than making others happy. Giving yourself space to embrace and show your feelings, other than being afraid to show your feelings. A life in which you have no fear of working on your talent, and only going to engage in it for your enjoyment, not for the sake of others. If we all lived this way, what a world we would live in. If we were walking around with love for ourselves, then we would freely give love to others. People would know where they stand with others. We wouldn’t waste time with people who are not good in our lives and life would flow much easier.

Even though a mentor is generally someone with much experience and knowledge on a topic, I have made him my self-love mentor. His wisdom of self-love should not be cast aside based on his age, but celebrated and supported because he has this kind of wisdom at an early age. Maybe you have a young one in your life that is able to teach you how to love yourself. If so, make sure to observe their behaviors and begin to act in the manner they would act. If not, or if you are looking for other ways to enhance your self-love try out the self-love meditation I have on my YouTube channel by clicking this link Enhance Self Love Meditation [10 Minutes]. You can also download a free copy of my eBook Go Within: Connection to Your Inner Self from my website under the client tools tab. Make sure to find little ways throughout your day to start to feel love for yourself. This act of self-love will go significantly further than any of your worry and anxiety that you feel much too often.

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